I'm so fucking not sorry!

Seriously guys.. if something is practically mine..doesnt it mean that no one else gets it and no one else has it. And that something cant go or be someone else's?
I think it means that.

Like when a home is yours.. Your neighbors know that it's your thing..actually it's your fucking house! YOUR.


But yeah, i guess it doesnt always go that way. Sometimes someone breaks in and takes over the whole house.
That just must be the way the life is supposed to be. It can't be just my bad luck that my house attracts too many burglars? Maybe my taste is too good compared to my other skills. Like sense and sensibility.

And anyway, can you ever FULLY TRUST an alarm-system? No matter if it's an inner one or the other one.

Life can suck so bad sometimes.

Not everything is gold that glitters.

"Finnish Project Runway? Muodin huipulle? Really? That's something I need to watch! Asap and every single second of it!"
I've watched it now. I watched part of the first episode: "Nah, maybe they r just trying too hard.. Next week it will be better"
I watched part of the second episode: "Hmm.. Wow..This is so boring. They r so boring. The do everything so wrong.. Maybe they will learn their lesson when they get some feedback from this and last week.."
I watched 80% of the newest,3rd episode: "FOR GOD'S SAKE! Do you know anything about fashion? Or style? Or even about making good TV-programmes? Or if nothing else, just how to entertain?"

THAT PROGRAMME SUCKS A FAT ASS BIG TIME!
1) The judges arent really any GREAT fashion experts.. For example.
Minna Cheung: Used be the host of Inno-programme(they decorated apartments..) and she is supposed to be a designer of 2or+ by Yat. Never heard of...... And the "brand" is her husband's.Plus, SERIOUSLY! It's Heidi Klum whose boots she is _trying_ to fill! MINNA IS NO HEIDI AT ALL!


2) The "Tim Gunn" of the programme is.. ehm.. Jaakko Selin. He's been a JOURNALIST in a couple of magazines/newspapers. He's been an assistant in some programmes..and a host in others. His comments about the outfits are just plain boring or JUST WRONG. GOD!

3) The host of Muodin Huipulle- extra is a stand-up comedian! Plus an actor! And a creative director(according to the wikipedia at least but who knows..) This show is supposed to be about FASHION! STYLE! And this idiot is dressed in hoodies, jeans and suits that dont fit. Did I already mention that he is overweight? And a comedian? And he sucks? There's just NOTHING about him that makes him FIT in that kind of programme! JESUS! It's like making fun of the whole consept of the show having him there..



4) Some of the designers know what they are doing. Some of them even have their own lines already! So WHY they r still there? WHY they were taken in that show? Some designers there are just so lost..

5) A lot of people in that show try to be very.. something.. I have no idea r they trying to be fashionable, stylish, chic,unique or haute couture! Whatever it is, it doesnt work! But gotta admit that SOME of them are trying very hard.


The whole programme is about trying. Trying on the outfits. Trying to make a good outfit. But clearly the contestants arent the only ones that are trying too hard! Or maybe it's just lack of the skill..lack of trying.
Theres so much improvement needed! The lights. The make-up of the judges (for example..). Filming. The places.
Do they really trust that much that everyone who likes Project Runway wants to(and WILL) watch this? This is like ruining a national monument. Killing the last extinct animal. Licking the blood from the ground after the Queen is assassinated. Something disgusting and ruined for good. It will take a while that I'll even try to watch any of the new finnish shows..especially the ones that r based in an american show!

They should get some real names in there.. And I know! Getting some real names COULD BE hard.. maybe impossible! But how about even trying to get some semi-great people from Sweden? UK? Some former models? Or maybe just admit the big mistake they did when they started this show here, give up and let the professionals do the good job!?

This show sucks so bad that I'd rather watch The Mentalist. And thats exatcly what I'm doing right now.

can u see the truck on my back?

On Monday morning my dad asked me to come to his farm. There was some work for me. Yippee. Why Yippee? Well, I think everyone knows that after work comes the money.. So now I got some money. But I'll save them.. I have some trips coming..hopefully.

I worked about 15hrs. The work was kinda hard. It doesnt sound that hard though: cut a cabbage out of the ground and carry it into the big wooden box.. then cut another one. But let me tell you something: it was friggin cold! And the cabbages werent that light. And I usually tried to carry at least 3.. And the box wasn't right next to me. So I had to walk to the box..carrying those cabbages..in that cold weather.. wearing 3 socks, big old boots, one pair of pants and one pair of thick skiing pants, 1 t-shirt, 2 hoodies, 1 woolen shirt and a jacket.. Plus a scarf and THE pipo. Luckily I wasnt on the field alone: with me, there was a middle-aged estonian woman who barely spoke any Finnish.. Luckily my Estonian skills are so excellent! HAH.




After the first day.. I couldnt sleep. Not properly. I need more physical work.(Okay just kidding ma'.. You can do all the raking outside!)

number one

"Im really happy for you, and imma let you finish, but this weekend was one of the best weekends of all time. One of the weekends of all time!"

FRIDAY:
-daytime: normal stuff, shopping and cleaning the house, walking outside with Nappi
-from about 6pm: friends, eating( for example "mexican" food and M&M's), watching TV, chatting, vodka
-nighttime:local pub/bar and some friends plus WINE! and other alcohols..

SATURDAY:
-first hrs: local pub/bar with the friends and the alcoholic drinks
-daytime: sleeping, taking a shower, just relaxing, reading Aku Ankka-comics.
-evening: hanging out with my friend at my neighbor's house(she was house-sitter)
-nighttime: having a good time with my BF and some of his friends at his older bro's flat.. with some good stuff. (the red wine was pretty gross though..)

SUNDAY:
-first hrs: still having a good time with my BF
-daytime: sleeping till 11, taking Nappi for a walk, eating a breakfast, reading Aku Ankka-comics, lighting a fire on my fireplace, watching TV, cooking like a maniac, washing the dishes(ALL THE CUPS AND GLASSES AND FORKS AND KNIVES AND SPOONS AND COOKING POTS ECC= HELL)..
-evening: taking Nappi out for a walk and watching TV and eating..I guess.
-nighttime: the plan is to stay at home ;P

I do it for you, just to suffer the consequences myself!

MY 2 WEEKS IN FINLAND HAVE INCLUDED..

SAUNA!

CLIMBING ON THE ROCKS AND BREAKING THE ÜBERTHICK PANTS OF MINE.


WALKING IN THE FOREST.


PEELING APPLES.


WALKING OUTSIDE AFTER THE RAIN.


WATCHING TRUE BLOOD!


GOING TO THE LIBRARY.


RIDING MY BICYCLE.


(FIRST I HAD TO FIND IT..)


GOING FOR WALKS WITH NAPPI.


BAKING BROWNIES!


MAKING A TUNA-PIE.


COOKING A MACARONI-SAUSAGE-CASSEROLE.


SOME SEMI-SHOPPING: HERE'S MY NEW BUTTON-EARRINGS FROM SEPPÄLÄ(€2,5) AND CANDIES.


(HUGE POSITIVE SURPRISE TO FIND OUT THAT THEY HAVE TRESEMMÉ IN FINLAND!! WOHOO!)

Business class? Not really. No red carpets.

Okay guys.. I've been here in F-land for 2weeks now.
So I guess it's time for me to tell something about those 2weeks.
And things I've done. People I've met. Places I've gone.

Getting back to F-land started in San Diego, CA, USA.
I woke up at 5 after about 3 hrs of sleep. Still, as I was walking out of the house I had as my home for over a year, I felt like I was just going somewhere, just to come back. Soon. Maybe after 2 weeks. Now it has been 2 weeks. I'm still here. And not going anywhere. But I'm still waiting that suddenly I get an email with the tickets and just print them and go. But thats not gonna happen until I have money to buy those tickets. And thats not gonna happen until I find a job. Which is pretty unlikely at the moment.
The flights were OK. I had a windowseat at every plan I was in. The guy next to me(he was american, but originally from somewhere else)was very nice, even though we didnt talk that much. On the european flight I had the whole row of seats for myself! HAH. Another thing that the planes had in common, in addition to the window seat they provided for me, was the they were all BROKEN when we were supposed to start boarding! Navigation,fuel tank, engine.. So not just something small or irrelevant. In München, at the gate to the plane to Helsinki, I encountered some finnish people. A little younger than me. Girls. And guess what -they hated me! They looked at me, saw my american football team -shirt and started talking. LOUD AND IN FINNISH..Like I was unable to understand them. They complained how all americans think they r something special and go around the places wearing all kinds of shirts that yell "AMERICA".. And other stuff. They talked sooo much shit about the US. And then, one girl said: "But it would be so great to go there! To the US!" And all the other girls agreed.






For a while when we were landing I was happy for a second. It tooked so beautiful. It meaning the cloud next to us.



The F-land that looked at me back from the window was just.. plain. But I guess that's the beauty in F-land. Being plain. No extra stuff. Not too many ppl. Nothing too fancy. Being "too" fancy is for Russia and its people. Thats just something I've heard.





In Helsinki I got my bags and started waiting for my sister. I bought a bottle of somekind of blueberry-soda-ish drink.. It cost me €3! It tasted bad. And when the checkout counter's lady said "Kolme euroa."(=3euros.) I thought(in side my head..or so I thought!) "Oh shut up.." but it turned out I said it out loud. Nice. It felt so unnatural to hear other people talking Finnish. It felt like..like everyone was wearing the same "unique" necklace/shirt/skirt. That "unique" item you got from your grandma and agreed to wear it just to please her.

I spent the next 2(?) days at my sister's friend's parent's place. It was very nice to see my sister. But all the time all I did was longed back to So-Cal and my people. Slept. Ate. Watched TV. Read some Aku Ankka-comics. And even tried to read some manga she had. At least I tried!
Me and my sister took a train from Tikkurila to Harjavalta. The man who checked our tickets was a great positive surprise! He was talkative and almost actually funny! The female next to me, on the other hand, was SO finnish! When she needed to get pass me(she had the window seat this time..) she just stood up and waited. Then looked at me very intensively.. And I gave up, and let her pass. Although, letting her just stand there until she would open her damn mouth and tell what she needs/wants, did cross my mind..
To my hometown I got on saturday about 3 o'clock. I was so happy. So damn happy. I knew I would be happy to see Nappi, but I was even happier. And the happiness havent faded away.
Still, dont get me wrong, but I'm not happy. I'm extremely happy to be with my baby again but.. Well, there's something I wish I could change.

R.I.P

R.I.P
3rd of October 2009
Rölli-the-guineapig